Twitterific

Thursday 20th May

I don't understand Twitter.

It's not blogging, it's not even commentary. I don't get it. It's not even a thought process, it's a short bubble of smug from someone who thinks their thoughts are worth listening to.

Now if you're announcing updates to something then I can see the point, with 'new picture/comic/weblog/something' up on my site, go look. But surely that's something you could do on your own website. Is it really that too difficult?

But no, there are thousands upon thousands of people feeding twitter with no more than their regular day-to-day activities. I go to the toilet myself. I eat food. I sleep. I do all these things myself, I don't need to know when somebody else is doing it. What possibly makes you think that I would want to know that?

It even affects people that I like and respect. They access it and share everything, thinking that people care, and they do!

WHY?

Let's take for example three people I actually respect and enjoy their work. Ben Croshaw (Yahtzee), Charlie Brooker and Stephen Fry and take a look at the world-shattering insights that they would like to tell the world.

Yahtzee -
"Story in local MX newspaper: OLD MAN LOSES LAST PIECE OF 5000 PIECE JIGSAW. Not so much a slow news day as a stationary one, I guess."
Yes.. and yet you then share it with us!

"Urgh, I think my beard has receded into my face"
So, you're sharing your freakish nature too.

"I would only ever cosplay as someone who dresses like a normal sane human being, rather than, say, a performance artist from space."
And you don't want to do cosplay either. Groovy. A great insight, thanks.

Charlie Brooker -
"Wonder if coalition govt will turn out like one of those TV crossovers where Magnum meets TJ Hooker, ie fun for 3mins then dull."
OK, one sensible philosophical thought. The entire rest of his twitter feed is updates as to his radio and tv shows and then 90% is replies to other people's twitter feeds. So for every bit you read that you understand, there's 20 that are gibberish to you. How useful.

Stephen Fry -
"England World Champions!!! How often do you get to type those words?"
Never, Stephen, Never. Though he's talking about cricket and surely cricket fans already know?

"Waiting outside Danny Baker's studio. About to do his Five Live radio show. Wish I had sliiiiiightly less of a head...."
I never want to know anything about Danny Baker. Ever. But thanks for letting me know I could listen to you, even if it involves hearing him too.

I love these people. I would pay good money to actually spend some time chatting and discussing life, the universe and everything with these people. But this isn't that sort of context, it's surely just a shouting contest with the sky.

I don't understand it, and if I ever decide to break down and use it, then please feel free to link to this very blog. Just to prove what a self obsessed freak I am.

I admit I have an ego. Sorry, wrote that wrong. I admit that I have an EGO, but still, isn't there a limit?