The Big Book of Vague Roleplay : chars

CHARACTERS

An interesting bunch of people for your next player characters

General

Vampire in a wheelbarrow
Take every disadvantage you can get, Paraplegic, Blind, Mute, Deaf, Bald, Ugly and whatever, then you get three other things. A ghoul to do your dirty work, a wheelbarrow, wheelchair, wheelybin or some other transport and a psychic connection to the ghoul. He can then be your eyes, ears, mouth and feet and when you need to feed he can just pick you up and swing you at your victim. Ta-da!

One Man Band
When you're facing off against the Cthuloid Nasties from the nether realm, there's someone you always need in the party. Perfect for sneaking into caves, carrying the high explosives and so on. THE ONE MAN BAND! OK, time to try your sneak roll... boom-tish-boom-tish-boom-tish. "I'm a one man baaaaaaand! Nobody caaaares nor understaaaaands!"

Small boy with stick
Facing a dead body in an alley, courtyard, desert, asteroid or morgue you'll notice that by the time you turn up there is always a small boy poking the body with a stick. It's not just the morbid curiosity of your average 7 year old, no. This is an etherial creature, an alien pathologist with skills beyond the understanding of normal mankind. And it's childish gibberings just before he scampers off? It's actually telling you how the body died. And then it cunningly vanishes. (If you've ever watched the excrement known as 'Final Fantasy : The Spirits Within' watch the final scene very closely. There he is... "Ghost of a dead alien planet, missus". And then he's gone.)

Deadlands

Mighty Joe & The Buffet Car Skiffle Band
Perfect for any mood, any setting, you know in the old west there's always a handy band in the corner ready to play some mood music, be it soft and gentle for the romance, tense for the dramatic, or fast and loose for the fight scene... Just hire Mighty Joe and his Buffet Car Skiffle Band, only $15 per hour. And you can't get 6 hookers for that price, trust me.

Bertha Morgan, Livery Stable Queen
To be ready to deal with the rigours of the west, you need a tough horse. And to deal with the tough horses of the west, there's Bertha. Shaves when she remembers and spits in a more macho way than most bear trappers. Wide as she is tall she's all muscle, but more than that, she's all woman and ready to prove it with her romantic side. Just don't go wandering near the stables too late at night.

The Dribble Brothers
Kyle, Cleet and Randy. Collective age of over 400 and they've been playing poker at the corner of the saloon for the past few centuries. They play very well but never for anything more than nickels, to the dissapointment of most passing river gamblers. And wherever you go, whatever saloon you go to, there they are.

White Wolf - Vampire

Squeamish Tzimisce
"OOooooooo, it wriggled! look at that! oh no, oh this isn't fun, look at that pink thing.... oh my god i think i'm gonna puke. ick! Argh! it moved again. Uuuurgh. I feel ill."

Internal-Monologue Malkavian
"I stepped into the darkened bar looking for the Brujah i was supposed to meet. From the fetid stench in the corner I'd say i found him. He smelt bad and looked worse, like his parents were rutting pigs. Suddenly from out of nowhere he hit me, but it was like a butterfly's kiss. He hit me again and told me to shut up. I looked at him square in the face hoping to scare him down and he pulled a gun on me. I was scared, though I still had the upper hand, He didn't know i'd killed his sire."

Mid-life Crisis Ventrue
OK, so you've lived for 300 years, you've dominated cities and doublecrossed enemies for decades. So obviously the next move is to get all leather clothes, slicked hair, a lamborgini and an 18yr old Ghoul. Hey, lepoard skin's still in fashion isn't it?

Shadow puppet Lamobra

Exhibitionist Nosferatu

Agoraphobic Gangrel
"Not going outside, it's scary, anything could happen. And there's things out there. Big Scary Things"

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